These 6 behaviors can be harmful to friends, how to avoid them?

 These 6 behaviors can be harmful to friends, how to avoid them?

Signs of a harmful friend include divulging secrets, being overly angry, and being self-centered.

If a relationship is harmful, it’s important to set clear boundaries, take time out, and end the friendship if necessary.

Friends help make life more meaningful. They provide social and emotional support, reduce feelings of loneliness, and boost your enthusiasm for life.

Maintaining social connections can help you live longer and reduce your risk of mental and physical health problems, such as depression and high blood pressure. However, some friends may not be so positive. Some friends can even be harmful.

Harmful friends come in many forms, but they usually cause mental stress and tend to pull you down rather than up. In such cases, it can be difficult to recognize a harmful friend.

What do harmful friends do?

Good friends may be rude or distant on bad days, but they will apologize when things get better. Harmful friends always behave in the same way. They don't show much remorse for their mistakes or apologize or change even when they know their friend is hurt.

1. They talk in jest

Friends tease each other lightly, sometimes even teasing and belittling. A little humor doesn't mean a friendship is toxic. However, when a friend regularly insults and hurts you, that friendship can be harmful. Whether they use subtle insulting tactics or outright insults, it's important to understand that the friendship is probably not healthy.

2. They spill secrets

If you tell your friend something in secret and they tell others about it, and many people find out, they may not be a good friend.

Harmful friends find it fun to spill secrets. They repeatedly break trust and show little regard for their partner’s feelings, even when asked to keep personal information confidential.

3. Makes false apologies

When their behavior is criticized, they ignore their partner’s pain or offer a superficial apology. Instead of taking the time to consider their partner’s perspective, they say, “I’m sorry, you feel that way,” or add a defensive “but” after the apology. For example, “I’m sorry, I hurt your feelings, but it was just a joke.”

4. Makes you nervous

A partner’s unexpected reactions can be uncomfortable and hurtful. It’s difficult to build trust and a secure relationship with someone who gets angry over small things and then acts normal right away. In such cases, it’s wise to proceed with caution.

A harmful partner gets angry and yells at them for small things, such as not listening to them properly or forgetting to bring something they promised. Then, the next minute, they act as if nothing happened.

5. Unstable

Spending time with close friends should generally feel good. But spending time with a specific friend can make you feel uncomfortable or sad. There may be no good explanation for why this happens. But when you are away from them, you feel relief rather than disappointment, and you don't want to spend time with that friend. If you feel this unstable feeling, you should consider checking other signs in your friendship.

A harmful friend will point out that you are weaker than your other friends. For example, they may say that your finances are not good, or that you don't dress well.

People have their own unique characteristics and differences, and a good friend understands this. They don't compare one friend to another.

6. Always put themselves at the center

A friend only comes when they are in a good mood or when they need something. They are not reachable when they are in trouble. Such a friend may talk about their current problems incessantly. When they have expressed their feelings, they will formally say, "How are you?" but quickly turn the conversation back to themselves.

Positive friends also offer empathy for their friend's concerns, whether the situation is good or bad. Such friends accept them as they are and support them when they ask for guidance for change, and wait until they are ready to ask for advice.

How do harmful friends affect you?

Harmful friends can have a significant impact on everything. But it's not a positive one. Spending time with people who don't care about your feelings can ultimately affect your emotional and physical health.

1. Feeling lonely and isolated

Spending time with friends should increase your sense of connection. However, harmful friends can make you feel neglected. If you're being left out of group plans, messages aren't answered, and the friendship feels one-sided, then the relationship may not be a true friendship. It's best to share your time and energy with people who value your value and presence.

2. Stress increases

A major benefit of strong friendships is reduced stress. Meeting friends may not always be 100% positive, but you can usually see some improvement. Harmful friends can add to stress rather than help relieve it. Even if you're not with them, the negatives they have There are many ways to think about interactions. Which can make you feel stressed, irritable, and downright bad.

3. Not feeling supported

A good friend provides support when needed. Friendship usually involves listening sympathetically and acknowledging pain or difficulty.

A harmful friendship never feels that support or compassion is received. They ignore their friend’s problems or don’t respond to their requests for help.

4. Hurts self-confidence and self-esteem

When someone constantly puts you down and treats you badly, you gradually accept this behavior and stop expecting anything better. When you start believing the insults of such a friend and start doubting your own strengths and abilities, your self-esteem can drop.

5. Blaming yourself for their behavior

Being with a bad friend can lead to self-doubt. If your friend gets angry with you, you start to think that it’s your fault that they’re angry. You blame yourself for not getting support from your friend and immediately help them.

6. Feeling unbalanced

People who behave in a toxic way can often make you doubt yourself. They can make you feel like you can't do the right thing. Inconsistent behavior, such as being happy at one moment, angry at the same time, creates confusion and imbalance.

These behaviors can reduce self-confidence and spread feelings of anxiety or sadness in other areas of your life. This can lead to uncertainty about how to move forward in a relationship with such a friend, which forces you to be constantly vigilant.

7. Other relationships are affected

A toxic friendship can slowly but steadily poison other close relationships. When you start to doubt yourself, you can see yourself as a bad friend. Even if you don't doubt yourself, it can be difficult to trust others. You may feel like everyone sees you as weak, boring, or unsupportive, and as a result, you start to ignore people.

This prevents you from seeking support from people who really care, which makes you feel more isolated and lonely.

What to do?

What to do if you realize that your friendship is toxic? There are two main options for this. First, talk to your friend. If possible, let them know how unpleasant their behavior is. If you want to save the friendship, it is better to choose the first option.

The other option is to end the friendship.

1. Give them a second chance

Maybe they weren't always toxic or don't understand how their behavior affects them. You can give them a second chance. If the person's behavior is not toxic but a lack of understanding, you should express your feelings to them and set clear boundaries. For example, "Your comments make me sad, please tell them not to do that in the future."

2. But always give them a chance

If the friendship is not yielding any positive benefits and talking to them hasn't helped, it may be time to end it. You can tell them how their actions are affecting you, but you can't force them to change. So it is best not to continue the friendship.

Such friends can temporarily promise to change and behave better. But if they still don't change their behavior, it's best to not continue the friendship.

3. Take time for yourself

Taking some time away from the friendship can help you understand your feelings and the importance of the relationship. If staying away makes you feel better, it could be a sign to reconsider the friendship. If not worrying about seeing them makes you feel better, it's a strong reason to end the friendship. This is an effective way to gain clarity and self-analysis.

4. Set boundaries

If you want to maintain the friendship, boundaries are important. You should clearly tell them that you won't accept behaviors like yelling at them over small things, lying, gossiping, or canceling plans without explanation. You should tell them how these behaviors affect you. If these behaviors don't change, it's best to end the relationship.

5. Practice moving on

When you know you need to end the friendship, let them know. It's a good idea to meet them and explain why you don't want to continue the relationship.

You should practice telling them this and organizing your thoughts. This will help you build confidence and stick to your decision.

6. Be clear

Be clear about why you don't want to continue the relationship with your friend. Don't be vague about the status of the friendship. If they don't want to end the friendship and try to cut off contact or blame you, calmly but firmly reiterate your decision. Ignore their anger or aggressive reactions.

7. Think carefully before reconnecting

If you decide to cut off contact with a harmful friend, you should trust your decision and avoid responding to contact attempts. As time goes by, you can think about the good times you had together and wonder if they have changed. However, you should remember why the friendship ended. Resuming it can be painful, so give it some time before reconsidering.

People can change, and if your friend contacts you with a genuine apology, say so. you can consider restarting the friendship.

8. Be open with others

Getting stuck in a toxic friendship can make you feel embarrassed, confused, or distrustful of others. If you have been isolated from other friends, it can be difficult to reconnect.

In such a situation, if you have some good friends, you should reach out to them and explain the situation. This can help you regain positive friendships.